“THE BABY MAMAS” – Yewande Adedokun

“The New Baby Mama Union Silly Initiative” by the modern day ladies seem to be a culture imbibed nowadays as we see everywhere in our darling country Nigeria. Ladies drop all morals, culture and discipline to confuse the state of marriage background.

Parents and people younger than me often ask when I intend to get married. Seriously, I don’t know anymore, gone are the days when you estimate a particular age to get married, but now only the smart ones do, marriage in a lot of ways does not have anything to do about you being a good girl anymore, that critaria is off the table for most men. As a young lady who is set to get married, as in, serious to get married in most cases not all, should better have one of these prerequisite; a good job, based abroad, have rich parents or from a rich background. You fail to have any of these, you just might not get married on time in Nigeria.

The BABY MAMAS have not made any search for a man easy. Help us! We good girls, because marriage might go into extinction any minute. These ladies I have tagged Baby mamas seem so at home with just dropping a kid for a man and make him a meal ticket at the snap of a finger just like that, Ori-oke (mountain top), Churches are filled up with young girls praying daily for husband material, but it seems before they climb down from the mountain top they’ve gone to pray to their God, the baby mamas are already devouring their husbands-to-be.

A lot of young men are their victims. Of recent I heard Davido was lamenting about his baby mama making him an ATM Machine paying double a normal amount for child support not to mention the 500k house rent he paid for 2 years. Well, his life is not much of my business, the only prayer is that he keeps making enough to pay more (one of the best prayers he can get in his life time). The interesting part of the story that caught my attention was where he mentioned that the lady took advantage of his young age so to speak. These girls are fast, a lot of times, all it takes them is a one night stand and they are made for life.

If I say let’s play a game now, I mention a celebrity’s name while readers chorus the word ‘Baby Mama’; Call: 2face


Call: Davido





Response……….. etc. Abeg, them too plenty, wetin?! Officially, this states that it is a crime to be a good and decent girl, because baby mamas got them all young.

The Nigerian society already reduced whatever image or value placed on a woman to nothing and now, young ladies resolve to this act. Gone are the days when a guy impregnates a lady and tries to deny it because he knows what it entails to claim responsibility of a woman with a child; it automatically means marriage, living together as a family because the lady’s family wants to save their daughter’s face. But that is not the case anymore. The case now is; “Ah! am almost thirty, it’s better I have a Baby and move on with life, how long will I wait for a man to come along”, “The boy is rich, whatelse am I looking for”, “If i dont get pregnant, he will not see the need to be serious” unknowing to them that a guy senses vulnerability and capitalize on it. For a guy that impregnates a lady these days you hear “Am not too young to have a child”, or “I will come over to your parents for a little introduction” and that is all you eventually get, you either live all your life popping babies for the same man without him taking you legally or he goes off to marry another and you get angry and look for JAZZ lol.

What seems to be a little mistake can cost a nation everything. A child born without a settled home is liable to pick on anything and sometimes follow the same pattern of life, all to the detriment of the society. A woman in a Nigeria society in most cases lack ambition to be better and make a meaning. She sees herself as someone who should strive to go to school get a job, get married and pop babies full stop, they lose the vision to go beyond that and affect their country or generation for good. We have examples of women in the country who are good examples; Mrs. Okonjo-Iweala, Linda Ikeji, Genevieve Nnaji, Omotola Jalade Ekehinde, the woman that owns Tara beauty house and so on. Nowhere in the Bible did God say; “And a woman shall stop hustle and stop makinng impact after childbirth”. There is more to be done in these world than attending to “self”.

Parents also have a role to play in the life of a child especially a female child, parents should be sensitive not to play down a female child’s ego within the family, support a female child’s dreams and not say “That career is not for women”. The world needs impactation and if we are already playing the possibilities of positive impactation down in a child, the child can only come up with the negative ones by making it suit you.

Ladies in the Nigerian society needs to carry themselves with more grace. These days, our men has tagged us with a general name, any little thing, you hear them say; “you are a woman you don’t know anything”. Let me tell you ladies what that means in another way “you are a woman, so you are dumb”, so, you have a right to be angry with the casual drop of these satatement. But in the real sense if we ass ladies did not give them the avenue to say these things, it will make no seense when they say it. Not even when the Nigerian constitution only used the ‘she’ word twice in all the laws.

If they don’t attach importance to us, let us attach importance to ourselves. The world is ours to take. Let’s declare ‘Baby Mama scarcity and we will see a sudden change that men will respect us enough to marry us because that will be there only choice if they intend to have kids to bare their names. If we dont start with respecting ourselves the truth is that, they won’t see a need to respect us.


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