Naija Guys By Profession

These days, one can categorize guys based on lots of things, from state to profession, to beliefs, to upbringing and so on. Today, a lot of women will reason with me on this. Here we go!

Doctors as the most recognized profession in this country are very cunning. They promise to take a chick on a date and they be like “call me to remind me o, you know how my job is” why should she remind you? And then, she does not give up on the first day of rejection by calling you to remind you and you be like ” chai, baby am on call o, can we postpone?” When really, you are just there with your head on the table sleeping or you are watching a movie on your laptop. They like avoiding dates.

Lawyers on the other hand only have room for one thing at a time. You will never know how that white and black uniform messes up their life. If they want you as a girlfriend, you will stay that way for a long time, if they just want romance and fun, then that is all you get. Everything is just this or that for them. Because they don’t seem to get it if you say you want more. I guess it’s the law. Like there is a law book for everything in life.

Computer Engineers are romantic, loving and dedicated, they barely waste time on relationships before they get married. The ‘but’ is that, the day a computer system malfunctions at their work place, you are on your own till that system starts working. Because, that is usually their first marriage. Most times their girlfriends direct their prayers more to the computers to work well instead of praying for their man.
The software developers are cool too, you just have to be able to talk in binary codes. I adviced one at a time that he should create a software where everything will be like a market to purchase things like social media apps, commercial apps and the rest of what we have now. He nodded to my idea actually, but I knew within me he’ll be like “what is she saying”. And they don’t like eating out. You have to be a good cook.

Accountants don’t know what they do when they do it. Only an accountant will take you shopping and ask for details of the goods from the sales man. They don’t know when they do it. If the price of a shoe is 12,000 naira, they be like ” 12 ke?, ok am not disputing, it looks original, but normally how much do you buy the leather of the shoe in the market? And this sole, can it be made in this country…for like how much?” When he eventually catches himself doing it, then he’ll be like “we will take it, but guy he cost small o, why? No chill! And he will have to say something about the shoe everytime you put it on, saying stuffs like “I remember that shoe”, “is that not the shoe that day”, “hmmm, you and this your 12k shoe”, “is this still the same shoe? It lasted o”.

Bankers are best admired behind the counter or within the four walls of a bank building. I feel for them when they I see them on the marketing field but you don’t want to see a banker outside the bank. After work, they go straight to a bar and hangout with friends, usually on Fridays and the first thing that comes off is their tie, then as they order their drink and start talking, their sleeves begin to roll up, some drink heavy. They like women too, they like to have a wife then a mistress that they treat like a wife too, might get her an apartment and stuffs. They can take you on multiple dates because it comes easy for them. They don’t know when not ask you to come open an account in their office, hell! They will ask you on the first date.

Civil Servants have time to dress well because they can resume work by 10, so no problem with dressing. The girl they take on a date usually is the girl they want to end up with. They have time for flings too. Every civil servants don’t do you favour without expecting a result. I give you, you give me technique.

The last I will mention today are the pastors. Very unfair, but they will tell you it is a sin you think of them that way. Five church members can come over to his house. No privacy and eventually when you have a private moment with him all he wants to do is counsel you. You cannot be a deep sleeper with these ones, you will get angry often, because most of the time they are led to pray in the middle of the night. The day he does not wake you up consider it ‘the pastor’s bonanza’.

Naija men rock. I love ’em!

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