(Clearing throat) yes!! We have gathered facts about guys for the remaining states that were not mentioned under this topic earlier. Ladies and gentlemen, here are the results gathered for Lagos, Igalas, Delta/Uhrobo, Calabar/Akwa Ibom, Oshogbo/Oyo and Ogun.
Everyone knows that born and bred Lagos people have big-issue, “skon skon” them dey Crase no b small and how the ones that migrate down there get influenced baffles me. Only in Lagos will a bus conductor feels he is man enough to get a one night stand from a chick. They just have this idea that if you come visit them and you no drop the MUVA, then their wallet gat no lost. They are not quick givers, but you fit enjoy if you drop for them and they feel too big. Every guy in Lagos has this feeling that their governor knows them personally, like they are connected to Dangote. A Lagos guy will size you up real good and make you feel timid at sight, but the truth is, most of them are hustlers, squatters, feed at a friend’s place, collect transport fare from mummy, friends or even girlfriends, but you won’t know this on the first day of meeting them. Like the one that took me on a date, asked if I have anything doing for the day and I said no, so we went on a canoe ride, on water for minutes only to get on the other side to check out his pig farm. Pig farm! Who takes a girl to see a pig farm?!, (no offense to the guy involved, no harm meant) or those that say, come to my house, on the first day, Kai!. The islanders are worse. Irritating to the core, their island is like UK to them. They be like “do you know island?” If you say yes they ask ” I mean do you know it very well?” Biko! The president is not even residing there. Wetin them want make Abuja guys do then? Very proud things.
Went to visit a friend I haven’t seen in years there, after talking about his relationship with this girl he might want to settle with soon, he directly said to me ” Yewande I really want to make out with you o, let’s make out now”…what is that even? He even went ahead to say ” I know a part of you wants to do it”. I looked around me to check if am the one growing too old or the idiot is the one without respect. They just feel too big for nothing. It will be a miracle to successful date them and end up with them. The funny thing about them though is that, even if they are not responsible in nature, once they realize they are married or have kids, that is all they talk about, they be like “my wife don’t let me eat out”, “sorry I got to get fuel for the gen, the weather is hot for my son”, #proudfather on their posts with their kid, as if they did not tell the chick to abort the baby at first. I don’t take them serious. You might have to move towards Ogun state axis of Lagos before you see serious ones, lik Agbara, Akute and so on.
Walahi the Igalas, I don’t understand these ones. I dated one for a long time but I don’t still get. They got mood swings, if they are sad you have to be sad. If they are happy they want to talk about the reason for days. To me, they are just human beings, but the strange kind. But, they are good partners, sometimes more matured than you expect, but the issue is how their sensitivity plays low, they just can’t phantom your feelings or emotions, you always have to say it in words. Can be boring if you don’t put your foot down. They are ok. Ok for girls that don’t want much in life, cos their jealousy range is hyper. But they are men where it counts.
Even God know sey Benin guys stingy. They only take a girl out once a year, how else do you explain the queue at the entrance of every eatery in Benin on Valentine’s day? The queue go long like sey Na pensioners wan collect money. No girl wan carry last that day because they know if they don’t go out that day, Na till next year, Na to stay house chop Banga soup. Edo guys on the other hand are better at least much relief from the Benins.
The Kwara/Ilorin guys are okay, cool-headed, no too much emotions, no unnecessary anger or drama, but they don’t carry a heavy pocket because almost all of them are civil servants, you can only love them for who they are. Even if they have a heavy pocket, they can’t spoil you with money, they are not brought up that way.
Delta/Uhrobo guys know within themselves that they are not out for long term relationship or romance, they try to break this jinx sometimes but, mien! Them no fit. They like point and kill, like walk down the road and suddenly feel like marrying next month, so they woo the first girl they come across. Their marriage is usually a surprise. Ask “I Go Die”, the first time we knew his wife, it was a family photo already with a son.
The Calabar/Akwa Ibom guys always like it full, strong and thick like Igbo people’s eba (asset-wise). And a meal is not complete without sex. So, their girlfriends often ask “you go chop before muva abi muva before food?”
The Oyo/Oshogbo guys are wonderful. If you desperately want to get married, they are probably your best bet. They will get married with ten Naira in their pocket by having a wedding where almost everything is in debt. It is not hard to know it’s an Oshogbo man’s wedding. The venue is usually a government secondary or primary school or town hall, the meat on the rice is usually tiny and generally the food won’t be enough. They do this because they believe things will be better for them as married men and usually it does. Dedicated people. They can work for twenty years without promotion. They won’t complain, but they need a patient woman to survive.
You cannot take local vibe out of an Ogun state or Osun guy. They like palm wine and dancing to local beats. They are the ones that insult modern day songs. Only oldies play in their stereo. They be like ” gbo Olando Owo s’aye e!” But they are funny and good family men.
After all said and done. I respect Nigerian guys, they are the future strength of this great country. God bless Nigeria, God bless Nigerian men.
Hit the blog tomorrow for “Nigerian Guys per Profession”. Peace.